Is Your Culture Open Enough to Talk About Sex?
- Megumi Hiramoto
- Oct 7, 2016
- 4 min read
“How do people in different countries talk about sex?”
This question came up when I was reading an article in Cosmopolitan Japan (cosmopolitan.com-jp). The contents in Cosmopolitan US and Japan are quite different. Japanese version has less sex related content, and I actually don’t feel it is Cosmopolitan.
Sex is an important topic in any culture, isn’t it?
I asked my girl friends who are from different cultures (China, France, and America) some questions and compared how sex education/sex talk is seen in their culture.
Japan
①Sex education
As my experience, I had only two or three classes in my high school. What I learnt from was only how to use condom and we should use it if you don’t want have a kid. I have never gotten sex education from my parents. Also, I would say most parents in Japan don’t talk about it with their kids. I took Human Sexuality class when I studied in university in Oregon as an exchange student. It was surprising I had so many things I could learn through a semester.
②Sex talk
Sex is not a common topic to talk about. I don’t talk about sex with my parents. But some of my friends say they do with their moms. I do talk about sex/sex life with my close friends back in Japan. The thing is the friends I talk about sex have experience of study abroad, have a boy friend from Western countries, and have many foreign friends. I feel many of my other friends would become uncomfortable if I start talking about sex.
I talked to a friend working as an assistant at Cosmopolitan Japan. She said some of Cosmopolitan US/UK articles are recognized as too sexual and could even by seen as a sexual site in Japan. She needs to consider well if the article about sex is acceptable or not. But an interesting thing she said is articles about sex can get more readers than other content. Wow! Even though the society is still not open about sex, many people want to know about it!
China
①Sex education
They have sex education in middle and high school. But most students don’t take it seriously. The education is focused on biological things and teachers try to use direct words such as sex. What they learn form sex education in school is very basic.
②Sex talk
Talking about sex seems still taboo in Chinese culture even thought it has slightly changed. Talking about it with parents rarely happens. Traditional parents would tell their kids they should not have sex before marriage. People there rarely talk about sex even to friends or peers.
France
①Sex education
Even though they have sex education in biology class in secondary school, what they learn is very basic. She says she didn’t learn almost anything because it seemed too young to learn about sex.
However, in every French city there is an association where they can talk and learn about sex for free. For example, a couple goes there together to learn safe sex, a girl goes there to know how to take pills, or a guy goes there to learn about STDs. This is very helpful especially for people who cannot talk about sex comfortably with their parents.
②Sex talk
Sex talk is not taboo at all in France. In her case, she talks about sex with her parents. It was a little awkward when she was teenager, but talking about it is normal in her family. It all depends on the family. As she does, French people talk about sex a lot with their friends and feel comfortable with it.
America
①Sex education
She had sex education in required sex class in high school and leanrt basically only how to use condoms and prevent STDs. She got sex education from her mother when her first period came. However, friends around her did not have a conversation about sex with their parents as she did with her mom. In her case, her mom taught her menstruation, sex (including intercourse), and the importance of the having a bond with the partner she chooses.
②Sex talk
Although she got sex education from her mom, she does not talk about her actual sex life. It really depends on person/family. She can comfortably talk about sex and sex life with her closest friends because she trusts them. Also generally talking bout sex does not seem taboo.
It turns out that at least these 4 countries do not have sex education that is really helpful in real life. How to have talk about sex depends on each person or family. But, it still seems like Asian cultures are more conservative about sex/sex talk than Western culture.
At last, I want to say France has cool system, doesn’t it? Each French city! Free! It must be very accessible, helpful, and reliable. If school doesn’t have good sex education, at least there should be places people can freely talk and learn about sex. I feel like having such system also makes society more open about sex.
Image provided by Megumi Hiramoto for 6 + done., 2016. Please do not use it without permission.
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